There may come a time when it’s not safe or appropriate for the person you care for to live in their own home anymore. Supporting someone with the move into residential care or supported living can be a challenging and emotional experience, both for the person moving and for those around them. As a carer, it is essential to approach the situation with sensitivity, understanding, and at times patience.
The reasons for the transition into supported living or residential care can be varied, their condition may have slowly deteriorated over many years, or they may have had an accident and suddenly need specialised support. Whatever the situation, and whatever type of home they’re moving to, it can be an unsettling time – for everyone involved.
If you’re finding the thought of moving into supported living difficult, it can be helpful to remember that the person you are supporting is moving because it’s the right option for them. It can be good to focus on the positives, which might include:
- 24-hour support from trained professionals.
- Specialised help to manage more complex needs.
- The chance for them to meet different people and try out new activities.
- More quality time for you to spend together, without the pressure of day-to-day care.
Here we share some steps to make the transition as smooth as possible. They may not be suitable for everyone, in every situation, but will give you a good starting point.
Looking into accommodation for the person you care for can feel like a huge responsibility. Asking family and friends to help can ease the pressure.
You might want to consider:
- Type of accommodation and level of support: That might be supported accommodation, a residential home or nursing home.
- Cost: How much is it? Is there financial support available?
- Location: Where is it? Is it accessible for friends and family?
- Cultural or spiritual needs: Does the person have faith or spiritual needs? Would they benefit from staff speaking a language other than English?
- Facilities: Does it allow pets? Can residents drink alcohol if they want to?
Paying for residential care can be expensive. There may be financial support available from your local authority, but this will depend on each individual situation.
The first step is ask the local authority for a care needs assessment and a financial assessment. This will give you clarity on which homes are affordable.
It can feel complicated to find out what financial support is available. We share some information here.
It’s really important to involve the person you support in conversations and decisions about where their next home will be – to whatever extent they’re able to.
This can help make the move less daunting for them. Ask what they want from their new home, answer their questions, and involve them in making choices, if that’s appropriate.
Take these conversations steadily. They can bring up difficult emotions, and it can help to have as much time as possible to think through options.
Planning the transition together can make it a positive experience. It can also help the person you care for to feel calmer about the move.
That planning might include:
- Talking about what they’d like to take with them – particularly objects or photos that will help to make them feel at home.
- Visiting the home before the move, or looking at photos of it together – this will help to make the new surroundings more familiar.
- Planning the first day – including who and what will help them to feel safe and supported. Talking through it beforehand might make an emotionally tough day, a little easier for you both.
Moving into supported living or residential care is a huge change that can bring up a whole range of emotions. There is no right or wrong.
The person you care for might be worried or overwhelmed. Giving them time and space to talk about what’s going on for them can help with the transition. Just listening is powerful.
And as a carer, you might feel a huge sense of loss, guilt, sadness or even relief. It can take time to adjust, so be patient with yourself.
You might like to join a Carers First support group in your area. We share some ideas about how to manage difficult emotions here.
The more the new home knows about the person you care for, the better support they’ll be able to give.
As well as essential information, like medical history and medications, you could share:
- Their daily routine.
- Likes and dislikes.
- Tasks they might need help with.
- The best way to support them if they’re upset.
- Jobs or interests they’ve had.
- Who their family and friends are.
It’s likely the care team will prompt these conversations, but it can be helpful for you to think about them in advance.
It can be a huge upheaval when someone you care for moves into a home, especially when you’ve looked after them for a long time.
Involve the Family as well, encourage family members to participate in the transition process. Their involvement can provide comfort and stability to the person moving.
But you don’t have to stop being a carer. Talk to staff at the home about how you can be involved in their care if you want to be.
You can help them adjust to their new surroundings by visiting regularly, if possible. Or there might be activities you can take part in, or a relatives and carers group to join.
Supporting someone through such a significant transition can be emotionally draining, so it is important to take care of yourself. Ensure you have a support system and taking breaks to recharge.
Remembering your empathy, patience, and understanding can make a world of difference during this challenging time. Each journey is unique, so if you would like more support or to hear others experiences of transitioning care, we have teams and groups for you to access at Carers First, for more information and to see if we are in your area please see here.
Online Help and Advice
Visit our online support section where we have provided advice and guidance on a range of relevant topics to help you in your caring role.